Thursday, December 12, 2013

One Day More (The Hobbit)

To the Tune of Les Mis 'One Day More'

[ME]
One day more!
Another day, another Hobbit dream.
And even now it seems;
These films that seem to fill my mind
Will surely end this daily grind;
One day more!

[MY FIANCE]
She won’t shut-up today
How can I live with this much longer?

[ME]
One day more.

[MY FIANCEE & MOTHER]
Tomorrow it’ll be Hobbit Day
And yet her obsession is much stronger

[FRIENDS]
One more day on her Tumbler

[MY FIANCEE & MOTHER]
Will we ever hear her stop?

[FRIENDS]
One more day of her not caring.

[MY FIANCEE & MOTHER]
I am tired of the slop.

[FRIENDS]
What a blog I might have known.

[MY FIANCEE & MOTHER]
And I swear I’ll just go nuts!

[FRIENDS]
But she cannot write a thing!

[THEATER EMPLOYEES]
One more day before it starts!

[FIANCEE]
Do I follow where she goes?

[THEATER EMPLOYEES]
And the cosplays flood our aisles.

[FIANCEE]
Should I join my lover there?

[THEATER EMPLOYEES]
When the lines begin to form

[FIANCEE]
Do I stay, will she care?

[THEATER EMPLOYEES]
Will you get the receipts and see?

[ALL]
The time is now, the day is here

[ME]
One day more!

[Smauglock fans]
One day more to sexy hobbits,
We will pinch them on the butt!
We’ll be ready for hot Smaug,
And write all sorts of smut!

[ME]
One day more!

[CONCESSION STAND]
Watch ‘em run around,
See her Hobbit doll,
Never know what sounds
you’ll hear when fan-girls bawl,
Here’s some nacho dip
That’s a little much!
Most of them are weirdos
So just don’t touch!

[Fans (2 Groups)]
[1:] One day to a new film classic

[2:] Raise the flag of fandom high!

[1:] And Thorin will be a king

[2:] And Thorin will be a king

[1:] Still two years till new ‘Jurassic’

[2:] There are dragons in the sky

[ALL]
Do you hear the fandom ring?

[MY FIANCEE, TO ME]
My place is here, I watch with you!

[ME]
One day more!

[THEATER EMPLOYEES]
We will mock these people’s heroes
We will giggle when they go
To enjoy their smutty secrets,
And perverted things they know.

[ME]
One day more!

[MY MOM]
Tomorrow she’ll be worlds away

[FRIENDS]
What a blog I might have known!

[MY MOM]
And yet for her it’s already started

[THEATER EMPLOYEES]
One more day to Hobbit mania
We will take the cash flash flood
We’ll be ready for these weird fans
Who say they’re of dragon-blood
[CONCESSION STAND EMPLOYEES]
Watch ‘em run around,
See her Hobbit doll,
Never know what sounds
you’ll hear when fan-girls bawl,
Here’s some nacho dip
That’s a little much!
Most of them are weirdos
So just don’t touch!

[ME]
Tomorrow I’ll be far away,
In middle earth where Hobbits play

[ALL]
Tomorrow we’ll discover
What Peter Jackson has in store!
One more dawn
One more day
One day more!

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