Happy Friday!
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Friday, July 11, 2014
Thursday, July 10, 2014
Five pop-culture summaries made via cultural osmosis
These are shows I haven't seen, movies I haven't watched, and books I haven't read. Let's see how accurate I can be just by living in America and being part of the culture.
5. The Sound of Music
Julie Andrews is a nun who the other nuns have some kind of problem with. She gets sent to be a teacher of some rich guy's kids in Germany and they sing and dance and run over the living hills. Until Nazi's show up. One of the kids goes bad and tries to turn his family in for trying to leave Germany, so they ditch him and climb over the hills to Switzerland. Yaaay!
4. True Blood
Rogue is still sucking your life away, but this time its via blood and not mutant powers! Vampires are out, loud, and proud and drink a blood replacement drink. So they're essentially people with hypohemia and sunlight sensitivity. Naturally, the south is offended by this, and wants them all dead.
And at some point Elliot Stabler shows up, but not for long. Booooo.
3. The Fault in Our Stars
Classic boy meets girl with cancer. Girl dies. They're both white and heterosexual. Somehow this is extremely controversial.
2. Once Upon a Time
Disney decides to market its own Alternate Universe fanfic as a show. Classic characters are turned human and brought to modern day society with no memories. So half the show is interesting flashbacks, and half is boring humans trying to remember the interesting flashbacks.
Also, they've started using real people like Pocahontas and Mulan. Not okay.
1. Dr. Who
Magic doctor who holds no degree travels through time and bodies putting right what once went wrong. Evil robots, aliens, magic phone booth, people who either get killed off or abandoned called companions, and a supreme evil called 'The Master'. Also magic screwdrivers.
That about cover it?
5. The Sound of Music
Julie Andrews is a nun who the other nuns have some kind of problem with. She gets sent to be a teacher of some rich guy's kids in Germany and they sing and dance and run over the living hills. Until Nazi's show up. One of the kids goes bad and tries to turn his family in for trying to leave Germany, so they ditch him and climb over the hills to Switzerland. Yaaay!
Spinning the whole way.
4. True Blood
Rogue is still sucking your life away, but this time its via blood and not mutant powers! Vampires are out, loud, and proud and drink a blood replacement drink. So they're essentially people with hypohemia and sunlight sensitivity. Naturally, the south is offended by this, and wants them all dead.
C'mon baby make it hurt so good
And at some point Elliot Stabler shows up, but not for long. Booooo.
3. The Fault in Our Stars
Classic boy meets girl with cancer. Girl dies. They're both white and heterosexual. Somehow this is extremely controversial.
Apparently, not okay
2. Once Upon a Time
Disney decides to market its own Alternate Universe fanfic as a show. Classic characters are turned human and brought to modern day society with no memories. So half the show is interesting flashbacks, and half is boring humans trying to remember the interesting flashbacks.
Looks like Dark Shadows to me.
Also, they've started using real people like Pocahontas and Mulan. Not okay.
1. Dr. Who
Magic doctor who holds no degree travels through time and bodies putting right what once went wrong. Evil robots, aliens, magic phone booth, people who either get killed off or abandoned called companions, and a supreme evil called 'The Master'. Also magic screwdrivers.
This happened, but apparently it is never spoken of.
That about cover it?
Wednesday, July 9, 2014
Attack on Titan, Episode 1: To You, in 2000 Years -The Fall of Shiganshina, Part 1
Minor spoilers!
So Bahamute and I just watched the first episode of that anime I've been hearing so much about, Attack on Titan. The basic premise is 2000 years from now humanity lives behind 150ft walls to keep giant humanoid monsters (aka Titans) out. There are soldiers and scouts who go out to try and fight, but literally get decimated every time.
Oh, and the Titans look like this:
So far I've only seen the first episode, so I don't know much about the plot. Eren, the young boy hero, wants to join the scouts since he thinks living in the walls is living like cattle. His father the town Doctor understands human curiosity. His mother flips her lid. His friends Mikasa and Armin are for and against leaving, respectively.
Then a Titan breaks down a wall and things deteriorate rapidly.
It's a very interesting concept, and I'm eager to see more. Just not in one day. This is a thing I've gotta take slow: and for someone who routinely marathons Law and Order SVU, Stephen King, AND American Horror Story, that's saying something.
I don't mind it being subtitled, but it is a very quick-moving plot. There's a lot I didn't mention above so MORE IMPORTANT SPOILERS: the city has been at peace for 100 years and people have grown complacent. Eren gets into fights with other people about it on a semi-regular basis. Right before the Titan attacks he helps Armin to not get his ass kicked.
The hardest part to watch is Eren going back to the ruins of his home and finding his mother alive, but unable to run. He sees her get torn in half and eaten while being unwillingly rescued by a drunkard/soldier he'd had words with earlier. Wow.
END MORE IMPORTANT SPOILERS
By the by, there's a lot of fanart, but this set is what really drove home the horror for me, and got me to watch the first episode. Have fun!
So Bahamute and I just watched the first episode of that anime I've been hearing so much about, Attack on Titan. The basic premise is 2000 years from now humanity lives behind 150ft walls to keep giant humanoid monsters (aka Titans) out. There are soldiers and scouts who go out to try and fight, but literally get decimated every time.
Oh, and the Titans look like this:
They are between 50 and 160 feet tall, by the by.
So far I've only seen the first episode, so I don't know much about the plot. Eren, the young boy hero, wants to join the scouts since he thinks living in the walls is living like cattle. His father the town Doctor understands human curiosity. His mother flips her lid. His friends Mikasa and Armin are for and against leaving, respectively.
Then a Titan breaks down a wall and things deteriorate rapidly.
It's a very interesting concept, and I'm eager to see more. Just not in one day. This is a thing I've gotta take slow: and for someone who routinely marathons Law and Order SVU, Stephen King, AND American Horror Story, that's saying something.
I don't mind it being subtitled, but it is a very quick-moving plot. There's a lot I didn't mention above so MORE IMPORTANT SPOILERS: the city has been at peace for 100 years and people have grown complacent. Eren gets into fights with other people about it on a semi-regular basis. Right before the Titan attacks he helps Armin to not get his ass kicked.
The hardest part to watch is Eren going back to the ruins of his home and finding his mother alive, but unable to run. He sees her get torn in half and eaten while being unwillingly rescued by a drunkard/soldier he'd had words with earlier. Wow.
END MORE IMPORTANT SPOILERS
By the by, there's a lot of fanart, but this set is what really drove home the horror for me, and got me to watch the first episode. Have fun!
Tuesday, July 8, 2014
Five of my ideas that never got off the ground
A list of my failed hopes and dreams for your enjoyment. Or just crap I thought up when I was bored.
5. Live-Action Dragon Ball Z Abridged
Pretty straight forward. I wanted to film a live-action version of TeamFourStar's HILARIOUS treatment of Dragon Ball Z.
Furthermore I wanted to play Vegeta since he's tiny and it would be a running gag that the Saiyin Prince was actually a chick.
Me: And I am the prince of all sayins!
Grizz: (as Piccolo) ...What?
Me: I said I am Vegeta, Pr--
Grizz: The Prince.
Me: Yes.
Grizz: Not princess.
Me: No. I am here to destory--
Grizz: You are clearly a woman.
Me: I am not!
Grizz: Those are obviously breasts.
Me: (breaking character) We didn't have anyone else the right size! Just drop it!
Grizz: Ah.
Yeah. Probably for the best that didn't work out.
4. Landshark the Manshark
Another simple one here: I wanted to make a short film about a scientist going mad, combining himself with a shark, and killing teens on the beach. I had a fairly solid plot outline by SyFy standards. There was a sassy woman shark scientist and a drunk ex-cop private detective and everything.
Long story short, it just never came together. But it still could, if I gave a damn. Free movie idea over here, SyFy!
3. Learning to draw
I bought a book. I bought a ton of books before that book. I practiced most of my school years. But I still draw like a five year old with palsy.
This is not a talent I posses or can develop. And I'm okay with that. Mostly.
2. Scripting 'The Nightmare Before Christmas' into a stage show.
This is actually being done now. But at age 16 I related the idea of turning the movie into a show and was promptly dismissed.
"Yeah...that would be impossible. It's a bad idea. Don't do it."
My heart shattered into a million pieces. I stopped what I was doing, convinced she was right, and I was stupid to have tried.
Don't let people tell you to not even try.
1. Being a Teacher
This was my plan in most of high school and part of college. But with the job market the way it is, the stress of being a teacher, and Michigan's stringent requirements, I stopped after getting my B.A. I'm happy being an administrative assistant. I like helping people.
Ultimately, I'm happier this didn't happen. Not all missed ideas are soul crushing!
5. Live-Action Dragon Ball Z Abridged
Pretty straight forward. I wanted to film a live-action version of TeamFourStar's HILARIOUS treatment of Dragon Ball Z.
Seems simple enough.
Furthermore I wanted to play Vegeta since he's tiny and it would be a running gag that the Saiyin Prince was actually a chick.
Me: And I am the prince of all sayins!
Grizz: (as Piccolo) ...What?
Me: I said I am Vegeta, Pr--
Grizz: The Prince.
Me: Yes.
Grizz: Not princess.
Me: No. I am here to destory--
Grizz: You are clearly a woman.
Me: I am not!
Grizz: Those are obviously breasts.
Me: (breaking character) We didn't have anyone else the right size! Just drop it!
Grizz: Ah.
Yeah. Probably for the best that didn't work out.
4. Landshark the Manshark
Another simple one here: I wanted to make a short film about a scientist going mad, combining himself with a shark, and killing teens on the beach. I had a fairly solid plot outline by SyFy standards. There was a sassy woman shark scientist and a drunk ex-cop private detective and everything.
It was less stupid than this. And this EXISTS.
Long story short, it just never came together. But it still could, if I gave a damn. Free movie idea over here, SyFy!
3. Learning to draw
I bought a book. I bought a ton of books before that book. I practiced most of my school years. But I still draw like a five year old with palsy.
This is not a talent I posses or can develop. And I'm okay with that. Mostly.
2. Scripting 'The Nightmare Before Christmas' into a stage show.
This is actually being done now. But at age 16 I related the idea of turning the movie into a show and was promptly dismissed.
"Yeah...that would be impossible. It's a bad idea. Don't do it."
My heart shattered into a million pieces. I stopped what I was doing, convinced she was right, and I was stupid to have tried.
Don't let people tell you to not even try.
1. Being a Teacher
This was my plan in most of high school and part of college. But with the job market the way it is, the stress of being a teacher, and Michigan's stringent requirements, I stopped after getting my B.A. I'm happy being an administrative assistant. I like helping people.
Also, none of this B.S.
Ultimately, I'm happier this didn't happen. Not all missed ideas are soul crushing!
Monday, July 7, 2014
Sailor Moon Crystal
I, like many of my internet brethren, just watched the first episode of Sailor Moon Crystal. And boy, was I...
Um
Well.
Don't get me wrong, the animation was great. I loved the heavenly choir style of music, and the voices are a big improvement over the dubbed American version from the 90s. But I'm not crying with happiness like many of the other commentators seem to be.
*weeping* WHY CAN'T I HAVE LEGS THAT GOOD?! WAAAAH
It was good. But anime like Fullmetal Alchemist has spoiled me. I expect a faithful, beautiful representation of the manga. And after buying and reading ALL of Sailor Moon over the last year, I'm pretty well versed in the mythos and madness.
Like this crucial scene
So overall, happy but not out of my mind hysterical with joy. That's fine. Plain happiness is wonderful. Watching an anime shouldn't move me to tears except once in a while.
Go to hell, Shou Tucker. BURN.
As a fan of the manga, I'd sure as hell recommend this version over the former one. No shoved-in morals, and Sailor Moon is stronger in this first episode than she was in most of the old series entire run. The characterizations are better, the animation is cleaner looking, and the music is fab. Good introduction to the series if you're not familiar with it.
So what are you waiting for? Take a peek!