Thursday, June 26, 2014

Five Broken Things in my office right now

You'd think a business that takes care of the dead would be pretty on the ball. You're wrong. Guest starring Dilbert comic strips, because I CAN.

5. The payment device


      When I started here back in January, we had two methods of payment: Cash/Check, or credit card. The cash/check was taken, copied, and the client family given a receipt. The credit card was swiped through a standard credit card reader, family given receipt. Easy. Until the complicated entry of payment into our computer systems, literally half my training.

     Now we have something called an EPD, or electronic payment device that is supposed to scan checks and credit cards, and put the information directly into our computer systems. Except it's NEVER worked right. Credit cards don't scan and have to be entered manually. NO check, not even the narrow range of accepted types, has ever scanned. So, we give manual receipts and do bank runs, but with a small black lump starring smugly at us from the desk. How it mocks me.

4. The oven/microwave


     Don't get me wrong, we have a fully functioning microwave. I don't work at a cave, or a lawyers office, like my last job. Problem is we have an oven and microwave set from the 1960s that just sits there emitting radiation. Also, people purportedly used to store beer in the oven (I've checked, its bone dry).
   
     Aside from causing cancer, I assume, it's a spot to stack paperwork and plastic bottles. And nobody knows if its still functional, or flammable. Learning is fun!

3. Empty ketchup bottle.


     Okay, not broken per say, but what do I eat my frozen fries with now? Nothing? Like a damned animal?

2. The old printer

     This thing is five feet tall and several hundred pounds. On the second floor. In the break room. It's never leaving. I'm making my peace with it: it was here before I was, and will remain long after I've gone. There's talk about finding a charity organization that wants it, but nobody has the authority, least of all me, to do something about it. So...yeah.

1. Management on the whole

     Long story incredibly short, my big boss is probably going to get demoted because of gross incompetence. If that wasn't enough, I was trained incorrectly in 50% of the things I learned, as was the person who trained me. I'm frequently told 'Don't listen to so and so, they' don't know what they're doing' when so and so is a higher rank and I HAVE to listen to him/her.

     I'm not alone in this, but it is a troubling trend. Scott Adams, why hast thou forsaken me?!
Not you. You're always with me.

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