There are plenty of guides on how to survive vampires and ghosts and swamp monsters. But what about the demons and driller killers of today? I've put together a handy reference guide on how to survive a James Wan-esq modern horror flick. Enjoy and stay alive!
5. Listen to the expert
This seems like a no-brainer. Not listening to the expert is what kills most extras in these movies. Jaws to Deep Shock and all the older women James Wan can throw at us, people need to listen when someone knowledgeable (or harmlessly crazy) says 'Do/Don't do a thing or you'll die.' Simple.
4. Never move
Moving was enough to stop ghosts in then 70s, but no longer. 90% of ghosts live in new houses nowadays. Ghosts in your current home? They're coming if you move, so save yourself the time and hassle. Fight on your home turf. ONLY move if an expert advises it; that rule supersedes most of these.
3. Be religious
Doesn't matter what religion, any will help (unless its satanic cult). Your father/priest/pastor/rabbi/monk will be more than happy to help with supernatural phenomena and emotional turmoil resulting from it. A cross/star of David/statue may even help keep your home safe! Just remember to avoid dibbuk boxes and the like.
2. Don’t have domestic strife
Good rule in general. Take the time to talk out issues with your SO instead of fighting or avoidance: long boring character pieces will scare away the most persistent killer.
1. Don’t engage
Don't get a Ouija board. Don't call local legends stupid. Don't say "It's only a story!" Don't try to get the attention of the bloody hobo wandering down the street. DON'T. JUST DON'T.
DON'T.
5. Listen to the expert
This seems like a no-brainer. Not listening to the expert is what kills most extras in these movies. Jaws to Deep Shock and all the older women James Wan can throw at us, people need to listen when someone knowledgeable (or harmlessly crazy) says 'Do/Don't do a thing or you'll die.' Simple.
4. Never move
Moving was enough to stop ghosts in then 70s, but no longer. 90% of ghosts live in new houses nowadays. Ghosts in your current home? They're coming if you move, so save yourself the time and hassle. Fight on your home turf. ONLY move if an expert advises it; that rule supersedes most of these.
3. Be religious
Doesn't matter what religion, any will help (unless its satanic cult). Your father/priest/pastor/rabbi/monk will be more than happy to help with supernatural phenomena and emotional turmoil resulting from it. A cross/star of David/statue may even help keep your home safe! Just remember to avoid dibbuk boxes and the like.
2. Don’t have domestic strife
Good rule in general. Take the time to talk out issues with your SO instead of fighting or avoidance: long boring character pieces will scare away the most persistent killer.
1. Don’t engage
Don't get a Ouija board. Don't call local legends stupid. Don't say "It's only a story!" Don't try to get the attention of the bloody hobo wandering down the street. DON'T. JUST DON'T.
DON'T.
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