See the elusive girl geek as she acts in local theater! Watch as she writes manuscripts, fanfiction, and anything else that come out of her deranged mind! Gawp as she reviews movies that normal women would run from in terror! GIRL GEEK!
I'm off work today. As you know, I work in an industry that has frequent contact with the deceased, and veterans (often one and the same). My great uncle served in WWII and passed away a few short months ago. My cousin fought in Iraq, as did his sister's husband. I have several friends who are vets and still dealing with government BS. I have friends currently serving in the Navy and the Army.
I don't know how to thank these people properly.
That's it. No jokes today. Go and hug your loved ones because a soldier fought to keep us free so you could. God bless and keep our men and women, past and present, here and gone, near and far.
"Rebecca" you say (unless you're a personal friend who knows my real name), what the hell do you mean by that? It's almost June, half-way through the year! I've stopped writing 2013 on my documents. 2014 isn't late. Unless you're trying for a very weird metaphor."
What did you think 'Father Time' did?
No, what I mean is the year is a month behind. After the crazy long winter, I sensed something was up. It took until May to figure it out: the weather is a month behind! Think about it: April showers bring May flowers. We didn't get much rain in April. But now?
Dammit Marlene, get in the house! I'll buy a new scarecrow!
What does this mean for climate change and global warming?
I have no clue. All I know is that if I'm right we're get a long summer and a warm Halloween. And I'm willing to wait for that.
Not being a gum chewer, these are a big loser for me. The very taste of gum makes me gag, so after a few cautious sucks, this thing is done. Bubblegum is the worst offender. I can do a few chomps with minty gum, but mint and fruit are an awful combination. So, no suckers with gum at the center for me.
Two out of Five angry customers.
3. Anything 'banana' flavored
Bananna Runts. Banana popsicles. Banana Laffy Taffy. Fruit is a hard flavor in general, but I've NEVER tasted a good banana flavored candy. NEVER. I like real bananas, so that's not it either. Other 'off' but tolerable fruit flavors? Usually grape and orange. *Shudder*
Any other flavor tastes great. Why did they fail so hard on vanilla? Vanilla is one of the primary flavors in chocolate (gasp), and they nailed that! The fruit flavored tootsie midgees are fine too. But they throw this in and 1-2-3: TERRIBLE.
I like chocolate. I like raisins. But the moment they touch, both are ruined. That is the power of the raisin, ruiner of candy and cookies. I had plain oatmeal cookies for the first time at a friend's house two days ago. IT WAS AMAZING. Raisins ROBBED me of that joy. FOR TWENTY SEVEN YEARS.
Is there a support group for thinking you hate a food, only to find you just hate it prepared a certain way and spent two decades or more wasting your life?
...
Didn't think so.
Zero out of Five anythings, because I'm not wasting the time for an image search on these things.
Freddy's been dead since part one of this franchise, so that's nothing new. This was a 3D "horror comedy" mess only worth watching for the always entertaining Robert Englund.
This is misleading in the best J.J. Abrams style. No clovers, and no real field, unless you count central park. Legend has it the title refers to the clover-like prints left by the monster, but this is yet unconfirmed. So...yeah, I got nothing.
No, not That Movie. This is a 1983 spanish movie that has "Nothing to do with pods, nothing to do with people, and EVERYTHING to do with hurting." in the words of Dr. Clayton Forrester. The original and more accurate title is "The New Extraterrestrials". It's more or less E.T. meets Alien. It's one of my favorite Joel era episodes of MST3K.
They aren't puppets, and they don't attack. They ARE people, so it's got that going at least. I recommend watching this with Rifftrax, as it's slightly more bearable. It was made as B feature by Bert I. Gordon, the genius behind The Amazing Colossal Man (a clip of it plays in the movie!) and Village of the Giants. Don't expect anything new here. The effects aren't the worst, but the scale issues are unforgivable. Are they barbie sized? Six inches tall? Something else entirely? Fucked if I know!
I've read all the books and short stories that Sir Arthur Conan Doyle produced, but sometimes a fan needs more! I'm excluding the BBC Sherlock because I've already talked about it, it's a bit on the nose, and because I have five others I can talk about just as easily.
Plus Moriarty is played by Niles from The Nanny, so that's a plus. He even comes back in a later episode, but the initial shock of realizing they've created life is too priceless to give up.
Many people complained about this adaptation, saying Holmes was too action hero, and not enough detective. I'd like to remind everyone that Holmes boxing was cannon from Doyle himself. Holmes was a bit of an action hero. It's about time that was acknowledged.
For your comparison pleasure.
I love the charisma between Downey and Jude Law. I love that Watson is just as bright as he should be, and that the schemes are grand and amazing. And I LOVE that Mycroft is played by Stephen Fry in the sequel. He's so sassy! Just like Stephen Fry IRL.
Prefer your detectives a little more lighthearted? Than Psych is for you. It's a good deal looser than the other adaptations on this list as well. Watson has become Burton "Gus" Guster, a pharmaceutical rep. Lestrade is Lassiter, a hard-nosed detective who HATES Shawn Spencer and...Okay, that's dead on.
This is a goofy show (as goofy as it can be with all the murder), and just plain fun. Shawn (Holmes) isn't socially maladjusted: he's actually a good guy, and a lot of fun. Most of the connection can be seen between him and Gus, as their patter is just perfect. Plus, they've been BFF since they were eight, and the show shows that A LOT.
Based on a book series I haven't read, this movie heralded the beginning of the Disney Renaissance. Technically it exists alongside Holmes (as the mice live below him, and we clearly hear Watson and Holmes talking), but I'm still counting it.
Professor Ratigan is played by the late Vincent Price, and gets the old decent song in the picture. It's said that this was Price's all time favorite role. You can hear why: He's loving every minute of this over-the-top romp. Dawson is still a little too Basil Rathbone fat bumbling Watson for my tastes, but he's a damn sight closer to Watson as written that that. One of my favorite Disney movies.
I'm currently in the middle of this show, never having finished it in the official run. All this is is a modern AU where they're all doctors. Also, House and Wilson are totally boning.
Being a married adult who manages a place routinely host to dead people, you'd assume I had my life together.
Here's a list of my dietetic woes for your amusement.
5. Pizza (ordered in)
Some days you just want something hot and fresh, but you can't go anywhere. Delivery pizza to the rescue! Even better when your boss is in and you HAVE to split because she can't eat everything and that smell is fantastic...
Four stars out of five. It's pizza.
4. Two day old shrimp in lobster sauce with fried rice
Chinese dinner combos make idea work lunches. The eggroll and most of the meat are gone, but there's still a ton of fried rice to soak up the sauce. Maybe even a fortune cookie to go with it. Mm-mm!
Three and a half stars out of five. The faded glory from the previous days shows, and that stuff takes forever to heat.
3. Applesauce cup, cheese sandwich crackers, string cheese, and a lemon meringue pudding cup.
Also known as 'Damnit, I though there was another frozen chicken sandwich' lunch. No main course is no problem, if done sparingly. I eat this about once a week, or whenever the groceries run low.
Rating: Two and a half stars out of five. It's so average.
2. Baloney sandwich on white bread, Simply Lemonade with Raspberry, and half a chocolate muffin.
Otherwise known as the 'There was a seminar at work and I got the leftovers' lunch. Since I'm alone most of the day, there isn't a handy person to foist leftovers on. There's a bunch of frozen danishes in the freezer, along with some juice and the other half of that muffin. I'm sitting pretty!
Rating: Four and a half out of five. Tasty! But rare.
1. Nothing
Sometimes there's nothing I like, but mostly I'm just not as hungry working a 6 hour shift. So, some days I don't eat until I get home? Healthy? Hell no. But it's the truth.
Eugene Levy is a comedic genius. Granted, I haven't seen all of his fine work, but what I have seen is always great. Here are five of my favorites.
5. The Car Salesman in National Lampoon's Vacation
A small, but vital role. This is the first of many screw yous Clark Griswold (aka Chevy Chase) will get over the course of the National Lampoon's vacation movies.
4. Gil Bender, Greg the Bunny
Gil, the director of Sweet Knuckle Junction, father to Jimmy, and all around control freak. A hilarious addition to any scene.
3. Plug Gard, Dilbert
A one-scene guys star (alongside Jerry Seinfeld of all people), in episode 'The Return'. It's on youtube and netflix if your curious. I love the whole show, and this episode is worth a watch or ten.
2. Guy Fontenot, Almost Heroes
Of course he's French! Why else would he speak with that outrageous accent?! The larger than life counterpart to the team's Indian Guide, Levy isn't in much, but what he is in is comedy gold.
1. Mitch Cohen, A Mighty Wind
A drugged-out relic from times gone by, Mitch is both funny and sad. The kiss between him and Mickey still tears me up a little. He's not a bad singer, either.
Happy Tuesday the 13th! Here's some stuff you may not know about the number 13.
5. 13 letters in your name? Bad luck!
Just take a look at these winners: Charles Manson, Jack the Ripper, Jeffrey Dahmer, and Theodore Bundy, just to name a few. But what about Scar the Lion? Or Colonel Kurtz? Or Nurse Ratched? Those movies/books knew what was up. Or it's a gigantic coincidence. But that wouldn't look good on my list.
4. JK Rowling used it well.
June 13th, 1943: Moaning Myrtle is murdered, and Tom Riddle frames Hagrid. Also, a giant spider is released into the forest. September 13th 1991: Harry and co discover Fluffy. October 13th 1996: Katie Bell touches the cursed necklace and goes to St. Mungos.
Not an overabundance, but just enough for the discerning/obsessive reader.
3. There's a musical called "13"
Musicals with numbers in the name are nothing new. Nine, Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, and countless others.
But in 2008 there was a new contender: "13". It's the story of a small town kid moving to NYC, dealing with his parents divorce, high school, and his upcoming Bar Mitzvah. It's played quite a lot, so it might be good. I don't know. It wasn't bad enough to go on my other list.
2. Season one of The Simpsons had 13 episodes.
The Simpsons is on episode five gazillion (roughly), but the first season paved the way. Known for rough animation, a strange Walter Mathau-esq Homer, and good-enough-to-get-a-second-season plots, it left it's mark on history. My favorite from these? "Krusty gets Busted." Gotta love Kelsey Grammar as Sideshow Bob.
1. Greg the Bunny ONLY had 13 episodes.
Ah, Greg the Bunny. How I love you. A proto avenue Q type show, Greg the Bunny lasted one glorious summer on Fox. It addressed the issues puppets (or fabricated Americans) faced in the real world (a loose term at best). Sadly, Fox dumped it along with The Lone Gunmen and a host of other shows. At least I'll always have the DVDs...somewhere...
Because Turtles are slow...Bahamute's favorite character, BTW.
